i think the very first entry i have wrote was about the start of school, and here i am again, a year later. school is starting soon for me, in like a week. as i write, i think about my summer. honestly, i dont think it was the most eventful. i did make more friends, yippee . . ! most are from online, since i suck at talking to people in real life, and i guess i coded, read, drew, and spent way too many hours on forsaken . . in short most of it consisted of resting really, from the previous school year. i have a tendency to by hyperfocused on numbers, and scores. last year, i wanted to focus on academics, because a year ago from then, my grades dropped to basically an alltime low - because it was also the time when i was at my lowest mentally. i guess it was like an obsession to get good scores, because i ended up pushing away many people from my life, and i abandoned many things that i wanted to do. i spoke less, and felt that it was wrong to feel attached or grow emotional over anything. it was foolish and irrational, now that i think about it in the present. next year, i want to try to be myself without as much restraints, and learn for the sake of so instead of focusing on grades so much. the weather is getting cooler, and the sky is getting more cloudy. maybe it will rain soon. autumn is coming again. i suppose my next entry might either be about me packing stuff, or about the start of school. i kind of feel like making one of those projects where you write an entry every day, or something like that.

this was actually a few weeks ago, when i discovered that i identify as fictionkin. i dont think the word "fictionkin" is one used often in everyday vocabulary, so i suppose i can explain it a bit. so, a fictionkin is someone who identifies as / feels a strong connection to a fictional character, entity, place, etc. the person could also view the character as someone they were in a past life, alternate universe -- so it can be on a spiritual or mental level. this identity however is involuntary, and on a non-physical level. fictionkin falls under the umbrella term of "otherkin," which means you identify with / as something other than human.

this was sort of a difficult realization for me, yet it also gave me relief, and helped me understand myself better. it made me happy to know that there was a group, a community of others out there like me, and that i was not alone. and for anyone who was curious, i kin with lain iwakura from "serial experiments lain"!

i believe this was all i like to say, have a good day / night to anybody who reads this

a diary entry for the first time in like 3 months ! dont worry guys im still alive lol

recently, balancing a lot of changes and a rather busy schedule was kind of difficult for me. the reason i couldnt write for a long time was because i felt burnt out and not really motivated, and yeah T w T

soo, for interesting events in my life, i guess i've gotten into reading more ! i found some more manga that i liked. i started on fma, and hunterxhunter. as well, i tried to work on my health and taking care of myself more, so i suppose theres that.

thank you for reading, i hope you have a nice day/night !

i am back ! some days ago, i was not feeling well, likely due to a sickness. it's around the time of flu season, so i guess thats probably why. i stayed home, and made some art while so.

i think i feel better today, so im gonna try to be productive, and finish my schoolwork and update the website again. i might start to do the layout for the art page, so i can hopefully put some things up there soon.

anyways, that's all for now. i hope you have a great day/night, to whoever reads this !

the first day of school was a few days ago ! i think it went okay. i didnt really talk much with people, the teachers were nice though. i got lost a few times, as expected, but i like my school. there was some homework, so i hadnt had time to write an entry qwq, this was kind of low effort.

school is starting soon for me, and today i decided to pack my backpack in preperation for the new school year. i organized my supplies in a different way than i did last year ... i think it will help with finding things.

for this school year, i hope i will make some new friends (i really need to work on my social skills), and as well, i will try to study hard to get my grades back up again.

i am going to a new one this year, so i hope i dont have a hard time finding the places i need to go to T _ T ..

i notice some leaves are falling too. autumn will start soon too. it is one of my favorite seasons, so that's one thing to look forward to.

and, i think this concludes all i wanted to write now. maybe i will write another entry when school starts.